One-Day Vacation

How to turn “One day we’ll take a vacation…” into a One-Day Vacation: Admitting that you need a vacation is the first step. Don’t think about all the places you can’t afford to go to. Think about all the places you CAN afford to go to. There are the Laurentians. There are the Eastern Townships. There are parks and lakes and hiking trails and festivals galore. And food! There’s lots of food to go visit. Got a favourite fruit? Find a place to pick it yourself. Got a favourite Quebec cheese? Go visit the creamery, go visit the goats. Whatever you do pick a destination that will get you out of the city. Don’t stay in the city. That’s not a vacation, that’s just a day off. And don’t do it on the weekend. That’s not even a day off, that’s just less time for laundry and groceries and giving the dog a bath. If you have a job, tell them you need to take a personal day. Don’t say it’s a sick day; tell them you have some family emergency you need to attend to. That’s no lie. Being in desperate need of a vacation totally counts as a family emergency. That’s one of the advantages of the one-day vacation – no one really needs to know where you are. Other advantages include: you don’t need a dog sitter and you don’t need to pack a change of clothes. Rent a car. Go on, you can do it. You can afford to rent a car for just one day. Forty-two dollars plus twenty bucks of gas. Split between two people. You could go alone, but don’t go in a group – group decision-making slows everything down. To offset costs, pack a picnic lunch, especially if you’re planning an out-doors-y and/or food-related vacation. If you’re going to pick berries, cream is in order. If you’re going to visit a creamery to buy cheese, you’d better bring a baguette. Either way, ice-packs and a cooler are a must. A picnic basket is not absolutely necessary, but sure helps get you into the spirit of the thing. As do sun hats. And shorts. And anything else you’d never wear in the city. Be sure to bring multiple contradictory road maps. You have to get a little bit lost, it adds to the adventure. But don’t get too lost – you only have a day. Don’t over-schedule – you’ll just get irritated. Don’t under-schedule – you’ll never get anywhere. Schedule one or two activities and add one or two more along the way. Start with a scheduled activity. See if you like it. If you do, see if they have any pamphlets on-site or ask them what they recommend you do next. Follow any hand-painted signs on the side of the road. Hand-painted signs lead to things like flea markets and home made pies and horse carrots (whatever they are) and sweet corn. Take pictures of silly brightly coloured things. Don’t tire yourself out. Have your fun then head for home. Hit the road earlier than you might think necessary. It’s a weekday; there’s going to be rush-hour traffic. And it’s summer; there’re going to be construction delays. If there’s too much construction on the highway, take a byway. Back roads are slower. But that’s okay. You’re on vacation. The car’s not due back until morning. So you might as well drive the hell out of it. When you do get home the dog will be so happy to see you you’ll feel like you were gone all week. And it you don’t answer the phone or the email for a few days after, then, when people ask: Where have you been? You can tell them: We were on vacation! See how easy it is? Go on. Have a great day.


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